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Dean Squad is a mission in the mod.

ObjectivesEdit

  • Drive to the scrapyard
  • Lose the police, don't damage the rear
  • Drive to Trey's house

ScriptEdit

Lis walks up to the gas station where Neil works at and meets Todd and Neil talking near the counter

Todd: Hey Lis, you look like shit.

Lis: Right, thanks.

Neil: What happened?

Lis: Larry and his cunt of a friend stole my car and beat my ass.

Todd: That fucking sucks.

Neil: *Same time as Todd* No fucking way.

Lis: Yeah fucking way.

Neil: You should probably call the police. I mean, it's-

Lis: I'm good, Neil. I got this.

Neil: An eye for an eye makes the world go blind, but alright.

Todd: Lis, you think Trey might know about it?

Lis: I don't know how he'd know, though-

Todd: Ahh, trust me, he does.

Lis: How?

Todd sighs in frustration, pulls out his phone, and calls Trey, putting him on speakerphone

Trey: Hello?

Todd: Trey, you wouldn't happen to know anything about where Uncle Neil's truck is, would you?

Trey: Uh...lemme check...he's at his work, right? At the 6-nine?

Lis & Neil look at each other in surprise as Todd continues talking

Todd: Right you are. Anyway, Lis got her car jumped by them Nazis, so do you think you can help us out?

Trey: A'ight, lemme see...uh...does she still have the Capital?

Todd: Yeah.

Trey: Let's see...37 north...uh...looks like that scrapyard outside of town.

Lis: Those motherfuckers!

Todd hangs up on Trey

Todd: So there's your fucking answer Lis, they got it stuck up in a scrapyard, and we gotta save it!

Lis: A'ight, I know the place.

Lis walks out the door as Neil follows her, calling out to Neil

Todd: Bye Uncle Neil!

They all get up and walk over to Neil's truck, commenting as they walk

Todd: Why'd Trey put trackers on all our cars, though?

Lis: What do you expect from a mentally unstable conspiracy nutter?

The player gains control of Lis. The player is instructed to drive to the scrapyard with Todd. During the drive, a conversation erupts

Lis: I'm sure your uncle won't mind us using his truck.

Todd: Right, so we got the crew, we're gonna get the whip, now we need a name for ourselves, yeah?

Lis: Makes sense, seeing as the cyberpunk faggots got a fancy name for themselves.

Todd: Alright, so we'll get a name for ourselves! How about..."Gabberheads"?

Lis: Na, na, how about "Always Hardcore"?

Todd: Ehh, I never really liked that video. "Rotterdam Terror Corps"?

Lis: That doesn't make sense, since we're not in Rotterdam.

Todd: We live on Dean street, though.

Lis: "Dean Street Terror Corps" then?

Todd: Nah, how about "Terror Squad?"

Lis: Dean Squad?

Todd: Fine by me. How 'bout you?

Lis: Fine by me. Now we're gonna be kicking ass!

Lis and Todd cheer

The player arrives at the scrapyard. Upon arrival, a cutscene occurs

Cunt is arguing with the scrapyard owner over Lis car as Todd and Lis walk up in the background

Cunt: What do you mean you can't buy this car off me?

Owner: Because this isn't a front for stolen cars and you don't have the proper paperwork.

Cunt: Of course I do, it's in the trunk, which you'll see when I give you the keys when you buy it-

Lis: Hey, cunt!

Cunt & the scrapyard owner turn to look at Lis & Todd

Lis: What're you doing with my fucking car?

Cunt: I'm...this ain't how it looks-

Todd: Shut the fuck up, you cunt!

Todd runs up to Cunt, grabs his neck, and slams Cunt's head on the roof of Lis' car multiple times to knock him out as Lis enters the driver's seat. Lis starts the car as Todd stuffs Cunt in the trunk as the scrapyard owner yells out at them

Owner: You bunch of lunatics! All of you! I'm calling the Sheriff!

The owner runs into his office as Todd enters Lis' car as the engine starts

The player gains control of Lis. The player is instructed to lose a two-star wanted level. While losing the wanted level, a conversation erupts

Todd: Drive motherfucker, he's calling the pigs!

Lis: Should be easy, now that I've got my car back.

Todd: Shit, shit, fucking cops, and we got the cunt in the trunk.

Lis: "Cunt in the trunk", sounds like one of those indie rock bands, yeah?

Todd: Kinda. More like an indie rock band's song though-

Lis: Album?

Todd: Yeah, probably an album. "Now presenting generic hipster indie rock band's new album - Cunt In The Trunk"!

Lis: I wouldn't buy it.

Todd: Me neither.

The player loses the wanted level. The player is then instructed to drive to Trey's house. During the drive, a conversation erupts

Todd: Alright, looks like you lost them.

Lis: A'ight, I'll swing the body by Trey's place.

Todd: Why?

Lis: We gotta keep this cunt somewhere, yeah? We can't keep him at my place because of my folks, can't keep him at Todd's because of his uncle-

Todd: So we're keeping him at Trey's?

Lis: Well...he's got a basement.

Todd: Good point.

The player arrives at Trey's house. Upon arrival, a cutscene occurs

Trey is practicing ninja kicks in his backyard as Todd and Lis enter. Todd is carrying Cunt's body over his shoulder

Lis: Yo, amigo.

Trey quickly turns to notice the two of them

Trey: Holy shit, you guys scared me.

Lis: Brutal. Anyway, we got the cunt who stole the car right here, and we gotta keep him somewhere 'till he wakes up.

Trey: Okay...so what's the plan?

Lis: We keep him in your basement till he wakes up and then we feed him his own testicles.

Trey: Ah...I don't think so-

Lis: What?

Trey: Yeah, I mean, I got-

Lis: Why the fuck not!?

Trey: I was telling you, I got some guy coming by to look at the...

Trey looks at Cunt for a few seconds before agreeing

Trey: Alright, fine. But only if you tell me how you got past my traps coming in.

Todd: What traps?

Trey: Goddamnit, not again. *Sighs* Fine, come with me.

Trey leads Todd into his house. Before Todd enters the house, he turns to Lis, who is still standing outside

Todd: You're not coming?

Lis: Na...not right now, at least.

Todd: Okay...well...later on, amigo.

Todd enters the house as Lis walks out of Trey's backyard

Mission Passed