Woodstock is an oddjob in the game.


  • Sing to the masses


Lis walks up to Moonbeam in the same spot she found in in the previous mission, who is now sitting cross-legged on top of the dumpster

Lis: What the fuck did you do-

Moonbeam: What?

Lis: I said, what did you do to me? One minute I'm taking that pill of yours, the next I'm fighting some cops in 1970-whatever, you fucking knob!

Moonbeam: Ah, yes. That's the first step of the enlightenment process-

Lis: *Interrupting* What?

Moonbeam: *Talking over Lis* -you see, you have to be shown the worst in people to find the best in people. Now, I've got part two in my pocket and-

Lis: No, no, I'm not taking no more pills or nothing.

Moonbeam: Why not? You'll love it.

Lis: No, I'm not going to take a pill and go back in time or go into the future or whatever the fuck you're gonna get me to go to.

Moonbeam: I see...I see I have lost your trust. Tell you what...

Moonbeam hands Lis a butterfly knife and the pill

Moonbeam: Take the pill, and if you don't have a groovy time, then take the knife and draw my blood and-

Lis: Kill you?

Moonbeam: Sure. Go on, take the pill.

Lis eyes the pill and ends up taking it before the screen cuts to black. The scene then slowly opens up on Lis standing on a stage surrounded by thousands of people. Lis looks behind her and notices the sign behind her reads "WOODSTOCK 1969". Lis turns around and faces again at the people and speaks into the microphone

Lis: Eh...hi there.

The crowd cheers loudly

Lis: So, uh...I'm either from the future and I'm like, a prophet or some shit, or this is a drug trip. Either way, it's going alright.

The crowd begins chanting "Woodstock" over and over again until Lis addresses them again

Lis: That what you want me to sing? I think I know that number.

The player gains control of Lis and is instructed to sing "Woodstock" by Joni Mitchell using a similar mechanic to the karaoke minigame

The lyrics can be found here

Right as Lis finshes the song, a helicopter comes out of nowhere and crashes into the stage, exploding into a huge fireball. The scene then cuts to Lis laying in the middle of a rural field in the present day, screaming profusely before calming down and standing up, commenting to herself

Lis: *Screams* Fucking hippie cunt!

Mission Passed